Babysitting
by IvoryQueen
Summary: Nero bumps into Vergil while grocery shopping. Vergil's stressed and wants to take Lady out on a date but there are two things in his way: his kids. So Nero offers to babysit. DxN and a little VxL
1. Chapter 1

**First off, I don't really want to call this a oneshot because I just adore this pairing and will hopefully be doing a lot more with it. Second, I wanted to shout out to bitbyboth for the advice since I didn't shout out last time so, thank you bitbyboth! :P Anyways hope ya'll injoy! XD**

**Warning: YAOI! No sex though. Sorry. If you don't like it then why'd you search for it?**

**Disclaimer: If I owned De****vil May Cry, Nero would already be Dante's love interest and all of my fellow Dante x Nero writers and I wouldn't need to do this.**

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><p>Dante had been happily, and legally, married for just over three years; Virgil and Lady, a happy six.<p>

Nero walked in the door with a bag of groceries in his hand and a worried look on his face. At first Dante didn't notice the look.

"So I ran into Vergil at the grocery store." Nero began.

"Oh, did you now." Dante said getting up from his desk and walking over to Nero. He took the plastic bag out of Nero's hand, placed it on the ground next to them, and wrapped his arms around Nero's waist.

"Yup." said Nero avoiding the kiss Dante was trying to place on his lips.

"What's wrong, babe?" Dante asked impatiently as Nero walked towards his desk.

"I got us a job." he said picking up a magazine and mindlessly flipping through it.

"Ok, and…" Dante implied looking for the catch.

"And he told me about his kids and Lady."

"What kind of job, are we talking about hear?"

"Well, it's not exactly a _traditional_ job."

"You didn't."

"Dante, they haven't had a night out since they had Isabelle. It's the least we can do."

Dante shook his head at his husband's naïveté. "Nero, they are literally **devil children**. As in they're one quarter demon!"

"And both of us are **half** demon." Nero said pointedly. Then his tone changed to more reassuring. "Babe, we fight full demons every day. How bad can it be to watch a couple of them?" He walked back over to Dante, wrapped his arms around him and gave him that kiss.

About twenty minutes later they were almost naked on the pool table when someone knocked on the door. Nero moaned and Dante shushed him. There was silence for a minute then they both heard another knock. Nero quickly rolled off of Dante and threw him his shirt as he hopped up off the pool table and put it on. He ran over to the door.

"Hello Dante." said Virgil apathetically, holding a small girl in his arm.

Nero struggled to get his shirt on and once successful he ran to join his husband at the door.

"Hi Nero. Thank you for offering to do this." Virgil continued.

"No problem. Hey do you guys maybe want to come in and have some coffee before your date?" Nero invited.

"Sure but only for a little. We have reservations." answered Lady. They entered Devil May Cry and a small boy appeared behind her leg. "Ok Isaac. You and Isabelle are going to spend the night with Uncle Dante and Uncle Nero." She said coaxing the child from out behind her. Dante inwardly cringed at the sound of the title. Nero's grin only grew. Lady guided her son over to Nero and he quickly took up a new hiding place behind Nero's leg. Vergil all the while played with the one-and-a-half-year-old girl's hand gingerly and when he saw lady hand over Isaac, he gently handed Isabelle to Dante. She took her seat, to everyone's surprise, quietly and acceptingly in Dante's strong arms. "Ok, so it's about 5:30 now. Please try to get them in bed by seven." Lady said sternly.

"We'll be back at about 11 and you can decide whether or not you want to keep them for the whole night." Vergil said.

"We'll see you at 11 than." Nero said and with that Lady and Vergil left Devil May Cry.

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><p><strong>So there it is, Chapter 1. This wasn't even supposed to go online in the first place, but I'm still a new writer and I'm lacking stories so I decided to put it up. Hope you like it. I'm an artist, I literally <strong>_**need**_** someone telling me what's wrong with my work, so please review! Chapter 2 coming when I finish it.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimers: We all know by now that Capcom owns all of Devil May Cry but I did reference the soda Mountain Dew™ so in case anyone's been living under a rock Pepsi™ owns that and they aren't paying me to put that in there. I'VE DISCLAIMED EVERYTHING!**

**Warning: Shounen ai and babies!**

**So here's chapter two! I won't tell you much except that !SPOILER ALERT! There will be a lot of property damage! XD enjoy!**

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><p>Chapter 2: Mountain Dew™ and Demons<p>

The second the three year old boy heard the door shut he saw something shiny and made a run for it. Nero noticed Isaac had left his side but shook it off as just child's play and restlessness and turned back to face Dante.

"See? This isn't so bad." He commented.

"Not yet."

Nero wrapped his arms around Dante's waist. Dante had forgotten he was holding Isabelle, but Isabelle didn't seem to mind seeing as she'd climbed on Dante's shoulder. Dante attempted to give Nero a kiss but was interrupted when his head was yanked to the side by his hair. He looked over to see what had caused such quick and unexpected pain and found that Isabelle had slipped off his shoulder and was hanging onto his hair for dear life.

"Ahh!" Dante yelped in pain. "Nero, it's stuck!"

Nero laughed and Dante swept his arm around his side to catch the falling child. Isabelle fell onto Dante's arm and Dante began slowly sweeping his arm back around to his front but stopped mid-swing. He looked at his out stretched arm and realized something. He couldn't bend it! Why; because Isabelle was located at his elbow resting sloth style. Dante, using his other hand as a safety net in case the child fell, started swing his arm up and down then side to side hoping to whip the one-and-a-half-year-old off. But no, the baby was staying on as if bound by superglue.

"Nero, GET IT OFF!" Dante yelled.

Nero was nearly in tears when suddenly…

_CRASH!_

"What the hell was that?" Nero straightened up and asked. The only traces of laughter left on his face being the reddened color and wet eyes. Both men (one with Isabelle swinging on his arm) rushed to the kitchen, where the sound had come from. There they saw, a half a dozen wasted eggs, the smeared remains of leftover pizza scattered across the floor, a crumpled pizza box not far behind, some spilled strawberry syrup, some Kyrie-home-made chicken soup swirling into the spilled syrup and a fridge shelf partially removed from and propped up against its place in the fridge. In the center of the mess sat a three year old boy wearing a leftover spaghetti hat and drinking the last can of Mountain Dew™ with both hands.

"Well, at least you went grocery shopping today." said Dante stepping over the mess. He took the sloth like girl and placed her on the island in the middle of the kitchen then bending down to pick up the now, no doubt, hyper boy and do the same. He made his way to the sink grabbing a washcloth and bending down to clean up the mess. Nero went around the island to the sink, grabbed a sponge and some dish soap, made his way back around the island to the mess on the floor, knelt down, and started to help Dante. Little did they know behind the curiosity had struck the hyper little mischief maker. Isaac had crawled to the edge of the stationary table and climbed tentatively down a bar stool. Through the open kitchen door he'd seen something big and shiny resting on Dante's desk: Rebellion. The toddler waddle out of the room and over to the desk. He jumped up a couple of times in pursuit of the large object until it fell thankfully next to instead of on top of him.

_CLANK!_

"I'll go check." Nero stated the words sounding routine and bored.

"Don't bother, it didn't sound that bad. Besides I need all the help I can get."

So the two kept cleaning, Isabelle teething (do to her fangs) on her pacifier on the table behind them. Nero had just placed the shelf back in the fridge when…

_CRASH!_

Although this time the noise was less metallic and more crystalline. Nero hopped up and rushed out the kitchen. The door, because of the toddler's clumsiness, had been almost fully closed obscuring vision of the scene in the main room.

"Here we go again."

"OH MY GOD!" Nero yelled the door to the kitchen shutting behind him.

Dante had been retrieving Isabelle while the door had been opened therefor not seeing the mess. Luckily Isabelle had grabbed Dante's neck otherwise he'd have dropped her. There before him was Rebellion lodged in a well shattered window and Isaac now climbing the leg of the pool table to reach Blue Rose.

"No no no no no no no! Don't touch that!" Nero yelled rushing over to the advancing toddler and wrenching him off the table leg. Dante, entranced by shock, set his niece on his desk and walked slowly toward the broken window. He held the demonic weapon gently turning around slowly and searching for any signs of damage to it. Then to Nero's complete surprise a huge smile crossed his lover's countenance.

"Came out without a scratch!" Dante exclaimed whipping it around and propping it against the wall. Now Nero was holding Isaac in one arm and blue rose as far from him as possible in the other while Isabelle, seeming to forget she had a pacifier, was chewing in the barrel of Ivory.

"No! Put that down!" Dante scolded walking tentatively toward the infant who had now turned the loaded gun so it was pointing at Dante and seemed to have found the trigger. "No! I said to put it down Isabelle!" The sound of her name caught Isabelle's attention but she'd already pulled the trigger. She ricocheted into the chair behind Dante's desk and Dante got shot in the shoulder. "GAHH DAMNIT!" He cursed holding his shoulder. He looked at Nero. "Still think it's not that bad?"

This went on for a couple more hours until Dante heard something he thought he'd never hear in his life. Isaac yawned. Not long after, Isabelle started rubbing her eyes. Luckily for the demon hunters, however unexpected, it was quite easy getting the little ones to sleep. Then they had alone time. Nero was already stretched out on the couch after putting Isabelle to sleep when Dante left the room he'd put Isaac to sleep in. He made his way down stairs to the "living room" and laid out on the sofa cuddling Nero.

"So that didn't go… horribly." Nero said sheepishly.

"Are you kidding me? Look at this place." Dante said gesturing to the destroyed house hold slash work space. They had a window to replace, a banister to fix, a chair to fix, a few table legs to reattach, and some broken bowls and plates to get rid of and Dante was sure the list went on. By the end of twenty minutes Dante was fully healed and whatever the kids did to themselves had fixed itself in an hour and a half. "So what have we learned here?"

"Never offer to babysit for Vergil again?" Nero guessed.

"Well… On account that I admittedly had fun, I wouldn't go that far. But… Next time we hide the Mountain Dew™."

Nero laughed. But the excitement wasn't over quite yet.

_KABOOM!_

The two hunters sprang from their seats. Nero rushed over to the stairs, Dante not far behind, to find Isabelle. She must have had a nightmare or something because she'd tripped on her nightgown descending the stairs and was now crying at the foot of them.

"Shhh it's ok, it's ok don't cry Uncle Nero's gotcha." Nero coaxed and picked up the infant. He felt a little goose egg rising on her head. "Dante go get some ice!" He ordered bouncing the one-and-a-half-year-old in his arms. Dante did what he was told and came back to Nero with an ice pack wrapped in a dishtowel.

"Here you go, babe." He said handing Nero the pack, a worried look on his face as he watched the uneasy child.

"Thanks."

At first, the introduction of the cold item on her head made the youth scream, hot tears running down her face but once she adjusted to the temperature and realized it was easing the pain she began to drift to sleep. Nero bounced her for a few minutes and Dante stood behind his husband and watched the sleeping infant, his arms wrapped around Nero's waist.

"Now I know what you're thinking and no. We can't get one."

Nero laughed and the two proceeded to put the infant to bed again. However, this time when they came downstairs, the two demon slayers were greeted by two more slayers.

"What…happened here?" Vergil asked in astonishment.

"You're kids, Verge." Dante replied

"So are we taking them or are the two little Devils spending the night?" Lady asked.

"Well we just got Isabelle back to bed. So, I'd be fine if they spent the night. Would you be ok with that, babe?" Nero answered then directed his attention to Dante.

"Well…If it's just one night…I don't see the harm. Besides, the only things here that seemingly aren't destroyed are the groceries."

Sure enough, there, in the middle of the main room, _untouched_, were the groceries.

"Alright well you have fun then and we'll swing by around eight to pick up the kids." Lady settled.

"Ok, well good night." Nero said.

"Good night, boys." Vergil bade them farewell and with that the night ended.

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><p><strong>So that's my story morning glory! Hope it was enjoyed there's what happened Hey It's Melmel! Please R&amp;R.<strong>


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